No crying in the Champagne Room

I think every once in a while a good cry is needed, especially if you're the type to hold things in. Trust me its gonna come out some way.. As days pass and turn into years from the experiences that I feel were pivotal in breaking me down I must say I'm more aware now of the importance of who I am. 

Those trials and tribulations were needed. I used to hate when people stated everything happens for a reason, especially when you're hurting. No one wants to hear that crap! They just want the pain to stop. I used to go over and over in my mind on how my life would have been just fine without devastating things happening. I still to some degree feel that way. I do. When you analyze things and dissect them pulling apart every aspect of something that did damage, you either become bitter or stronger. If you voice this and forget to mention your complacency in those things, people want to say you're playing the victim card. Let's be clear, we have to call it complacency due to staying in situations longer than you were supposed to.  I don't feel you're  being a victim acknowledging what you have done and what others have done in scenarios. There are always gonna be winners and losers in situations if you're always competing when, there's to be no competition in love... 

I come more and more into my own and on another level of my being. Things have gotten more clear as to who I am and what I desire. It took me a long time to get here and a lot of trial and error. Therapy is definitely a great tool if it's available.. Sometimes silence and gentle understanding of ones self is even better. People may not like who you've become once you learn you and walk into who you are unapologetically. You have to be "ok" with that. I've finally learned that. Leaving mistakes in the past and starting again can be a great thing if you take the lessons with you, so that you aren't in an everlasting cycle of the same test that you still haven't passed. 

Tru Straub